AR to AF {Part 13 The Move}

I have had several people ask me, "how in the world did y'all wind up in Africa"?

Most of the time that ends with me stuttering around and giving some kind of a lame answer.
Not because there isn't a really good (non-lame) answer,
but because it is hard to know where to get started.

Sooo, I thought I would begin to share the story that God wrote for us.
It is a looonng story that spans many years.
But don't worry, no chapter book today!
 I will give it to you a bit at a time!

If you want to catch up to speed, you can find:

Part 1 {here}
Part 2 {here}
Part 3 {here}
Part 4 {here}
Part 5 {here}
Part 6 {here}
Part 7 {here}
Part 8 {here}

Part 9 {here}

Part 10 {here}

Part 11 {here}

Part 12 {here}

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

This month marks four year of living in Malawi...and I am finally finishing up how we wound up here. This is the last installment of AR to AF!

When we arrived back in the States from Congo, we spent a six short weeks rushing around to get all the girls' paperwork completed so that we would be able to move to Malawi. We finalized the re-adoption of the girls in our home state, acquired green cards, and US passports. God moved mountains and worked miracles to finalize everything so quickly. 

Besides scrambling for paperwork, we tried to spend time with our family and also form  bonds with our girls. You can check out some memories made in our adoption video. We had so much fun re-watching this today!

In October 2013, our new formed family of six boarded a plane to move to Malawi. That day was really surreal. We were ready to move and begin our new lives in Malawi. We were still fully immersed in the hard work of blending our family together. We were nervous, excited, anticipant, yet also really sad to be leaving our family, friends and church. It was a weird mix of emotions.

{Our family at the airport with our friends/BOD members/Co-founders of Esther's House}

After 3 days of traveling, we arrived in Malawi and were warmly greeted by the two families that were on our team (Carneys and Jacksons). We spent the night in the capital city so we could go grocery shopping in the morning. I remember having an emotional breakdown in the grocery store. What does 5,600 MWK for peanut butter mean? Are we going to go broke at the grocery store? What do we need to buy? If I don't buy it now, will we starve? I am so tired!

Oh my gosh, what have we done?!

We drove to Ntcheu and arrived to Esther's House after dark that night. We had nine little smiling faced children waiting for us on our front porch. We entered our home and found our boxes with all of our earthly belongings in the living room and our beds put together (thank you Carneys!). 

We had no electricity. 

We were home.

{First week in Malawi going to buy mangos with the Jacksons. Note how tiny my kids are!}

I don't have many pictures for the next few months after this. 

We were learning how to live in Malawi. 

How to do our jobs. 

Where to buy stuff.

We were learning the culture and how things worked. 

We were learning how to homeschool.

How to cook, find water, manage life without much electricity.

We were learning how to be a family of six.

How to be a working mom with no baby sitter.

How not to get sick when we ate.

How to parent kids from hard places.

 Thinking back on those days, I realize how naive we were. 

How many BIG changes we had just put our family through. 

We had no idea the lessons we would learn, the hurts we would experience, the joy and healing that would come. 

We could not fathom how God would show us how we desperately NEEDED Him, 

minute by minute. 

 By the grace of God, we learned most those things (always learning) and by the grace of God we are still here! 

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Thanks so much for following along with our family's journey.  I hope you will keep hanging around as new adventures are on the horizon that we will be sharing with you all soon!

SEVEN

Our baby is SEVEN!

Past birthdays:

FOUR

FIVE

SIX

We feel so blessed that we have spent four birthdays with Asher!

Asher brings so much joy and laughter to our family.

She has never met a stranger. 

She is compassionate, silly, and is into everything!

She entertains herself well and has a great imagination.

  

Asher is a dare devil and has no fear of trying scary or new things. 

She is a go-er and a mover and a champion racer on all fours. Asher is an Uno extraordinaire!

Favorites at Seven

Favorite Colors: blue and red

Favorite Movie: Moana

Favorite Food: Cereal 

Favorite Drink: Kool-Aid

Favorite thing to play: "with my brother"

Favorite Friend: "Esther"

Favorite thing to do with mommy: "watch a movie and eat popcorn and chocolate with her"

Favorite thing to do with daddy: "hanging out in you guys-es bed and watching a movie and eating chocolate"

What do you want to be when you grown up? "a ballerina"

Arkansas to Africa {Part 11 Delays}

Welp, I did not mean to neglect my little blog, but somehow many months have passed by and here she lays, all dusty. I am excited to get back into updating this little space more often and to finally sitting down and finishing the AR to AF series. I am finding that my memory is getting fuzzy on the details and I want to wrap this up before I completely forget it!

I have had several people ask me, "how in the world did y'all wind up in Africa"?

Most of the time that ends with me stuttering around and giving some kind of a lame answer.
Not because there isn't a really good (non-lame) answer,
but because it is hard to know where to get started.

Sooo, I thought I would begin to share the story that God wrote for us.
It is a looonng story that spans many years.
But don't worry, no chapter book today!
 I will give it to you a bit at a time!

If you want to catch up to speed, you can find:

Part 1 {here}
Part 2 {here}
Part 3 {here}
Part 4 {here}
Part 5 {here}
Part 6 {here}
Part 7 {here}
Part 8 {here}

Part 9 {here}

Part 10 {here}

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

After leaving off 18 months ago {i will complete this, i will complete this}, we thought we would get approval to travel to bring our daughters home in February 2013 and move to Malawi in May 2013. We received news that changed our timeline and left us unsure of how it all was going to go down.

The United States Embassy in our girl's birth country issued a change in policy. Instead of a two week investigation before approval of visas, they were going to begin a mandatory 6 month investigation. On one hand, we were all for more checks and balances to make sure our adoption was ethical, but on the other hand, the delay felt like a punch in the gut as our girls were waiting in a transition house for us. The extra six month wait felt like an eternity. We also weren't sure that six months wouldn't actually turn into a year or more. Our girls were from a village that was a six hour flight from where the US Embassy was located. The USE had no idea of when they would actually make it to their area to perform their investigation. 

While we waited, we started our fundraising to move to Malawi. We took advantage of our girls not being home and spent four months meeting (once, twice, sometimes three meeting a day) with friends, family, and churches to find ministry partners. God performed miracles and led people to come on board with us and completely fund all of our needs. It was really a big faith building and humbling time.

Meanwhile, it looked like our girls' investigation was not going to happen anytime soon. We decided to go ahead and move to Malawi and live there until we gained permission to come and get our daughters. We sold our house and the majority of our belongings. What we didn't sell, we loaded onto a 12' x 12' space and shipped our things to Malawi. We bought tickets to move in July 2013. 

A few weeks before we moved, we received a special surprise that caused us to cancel our flights to Malawi.......

Stay tuned! I promise I will update before 18 months passes by again. 

{SIX} Birthday

These birthdays keep coming faster and faster it seems! 

Hard to believe our Asher girl is SIX!

Here is her 4th birthday

and her

5th birthday

Man, we could not love this girl more!

She just exudes LIFE and JOY!

She is our worry free girl who is fear-less!

She's the 3 year old jumping off a clip into the lake.

The 5 year old diving off the diving board with her floaties.

She's the kid that insists on going on the scary zip-line course all by herself.

She's kind and compassionate.

She loves people and has never met a stranger.

She is almost always happy and peppy!

She is also energetic...and LOUD.

She's the last one to fall asleep each night and the first one to wake up each morning.

She loves to laugh and thinks her jokes are the funniest.

We love you Asher! We hope you never change! You make life more fun for everyone!

Favorites at SIX

Favorite Colors: blue

Favorite Movie: Wild Kratts

Favorite Food: Cereal

Favorite Drink: ice water

Favorite thing to play: play on the trampoline with Esther 

Favorite Friend: Kiera and Makenzie

Favorite thing to do with mommy: "watch a movie"

Favorite thing to do with daddy: "play with him"

What do you want to be when you grown up? "a cook"

A Day in the Life {Journal Entry}

I have been wanting to document more of our day to day life here in Malawi. Funny, embarrassing, mundane stuff that I know I will enjoy looking back on one day. 
My past "A Day in the Life" journal entries can be found...

here
here
&
here

11/2013

This journal entry was one of our very first "adventures" or "cultural experiences" when moving to Malawi. We had been living here for about a month and decided to go try out the lake with our missionary team (3 families). At that time, we were serving with a sweet, young, newly wed couple and they made the brave decision to ride in our car (with our FOUR children) to the lake (about a 2 hour drive). We made the trip TO the lake and enjoyed a wonderful day swimming, snorkelling, cliff jumping and eating the local chambo (fish) and rice. We left at just the right time to head home before it got dark. The roads to the lake are pretty rough with deep potholes on the edges. Between the potholes, goats, bicycles, and walkers, you don't want to be driving on this road at dark. 

We drove down the loooong washboard dirt road and noticed that our car was starting to over heat. We pulled over to let the radiator cool down and give the other family a heads up that we were having car troubles. At this time, one of our very new-to-us daughters decided to perform one of her epic melt downs, that she used to have back then. In her defence she had only been in our family for 2.5 short months and had experienced 2 MAJOR moves. We had grown used to these and knew how to ride them out, but all the locals were very concerned about the "malawian looking child" with a bunch of Americans who clearly didn't know how to make the child stop crying. We attracted quite the crowd.

Once the fit/radiator had cooled down, we decided to get back in the car and try to make it home. A few feet down the black top road, the radiator blew. Our car was done. Next, began our long 7 hour journey back home. Yes, 7 hours to drive what should be a 2 hour trip. We found a small truck who was willing to pull us with a rope home (for a price). The only problem was that he didn't have brake lights...nor fuel. So, as we putted home in the dark, David (husband/driver) was at high alert trying to strain his eyes in case the truck pulling us was slowing down or stopping. Our brakes and power steering were pretty non-existent at this point, so it made for a stressful driving experience. Every few miles, the driver would pull over and he and his buddies would disappear into the bush looking for black market fuel. No gas stations were on this road and the ones we finally would pass were closed because......yeah, it's dark. We spent many a hour on the side of the road waiting for fuel. So thankful that the other missionary friend brought her laptop with Ducky Dynasty episodes on it to keep our kids semi-entertained. We attracted a lot of attention with every stop and adults and kids alike were all gathered around the back of our car watching Duck Dynasty with our kids.

We arrived home late that night and everyone was asleep, except tired driver. This was definitely one of our biggest life lessons of what to expect when traveling in Malawi:

Expect things not to go as expected. 
Be chill about the unexpected or you will go crazy. 
Pack extra things for your kids like food, water and entertainment in case you trip doesn't go as planned (because it never will!).
It's your choice how to deal with difficulties. You can chose joy or chose frustration. (still learning 
this one)

New {2016}

I am really not much of a  New Year's Resolution kinda gal. 

Living here in Malawi, Christmas and New Year's slip by kinda quiet like and if it wasn't for social media, then I wouldn't even realize  that Jan.1 marks the date you're supposed to have your list of "top 10" things you want to change about yourself.

But God had a different plan for me this year and many things that He is wanting to change in my life. The other night as I lay awake in bed tossing and turning, the whole house asleep and quiet, God spoke a word over me and it was the word....NEW. A really simple, 3 lettered word, but it had a powerful meaning for me. Starting that night, God wanted to make me new. 

He whispered a word of freedom over my life and I instantly felt like a different person.

"Do not conformed to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the reNEWing of your mind' 

Romans 12:2 NLT {emphasis mine}

In 2013, I was a stay-at-home mom with 2 children and had a perfect little university model school  that my boys attended. The school allowed me to have 2 days all alone doing whatever my little heart desired. Almost in an instant, I became a mother of 4 (lovely but LOUD children), living in another country, having 0 days or even minutes of alone time, and became a working mom. All.at.once. It was a harder adjustment than I realized at the time, and looking back, it kicked my tail. It still kicks my tail.

Ever since I can remember, I have wanted a whole gaggle of kids. Big, loud families always looked like so much fun to me! When my own reality wasn't quite measuring up, I felt guilty that my blessings from the Lord were not filling me with joy. Things that I had prayed for, for years for were being answered. Instead of being thankful and content, I felt overwhelmed which opened the door to Satan totally kicking me in the face with feelings of unworthiness, guilt and shame. 

When parenting was super, super hard (transitions, bonding, trauma, homesickness for all 4 kiddos) it became easier to love on other kids than my own. 

A few months ago, around the 2 year mark of living and adjusting to life here, it felt like we were finally coming up for some air. I also realized that we had listed "please pray for balance in ministry and family" as a prayer request for the past 24 months straight on our newsletters. I began to really have conversations with God about if this balance was ever going to happen or if it was even possible. Then, God gave me this word, "new". I felt like He was telling me, "you don't have to keep living this way, Look! I am making you new. I am going to give you a new way to think, a new way to talk, a new way to feel, a new way to love your family, a new way to operate your days." 

I don't have to keep living in the old. I know this sounds simple or maybe even weird, but when you are struggling through your days, it is easier to just keep doing the same, old same old. Immediately God gave me some really simple and easy ideas of things I can change now. Really specific things that are bringing change and joy to my day to day living now. He is "restoring the years the locust have eaten" 

Joel 2:25.

He is giving me joy in my parenting like I used to have. He is showing me how I can create balance and really savor the season of life that He has me in now. He is also showing me that no matter where I live, or what my current ministry is, my kids and family will always be my first ministry. 

That releases a lot of guilt from this people pleaser that I am. 

I am so thankful that at salvation Christ made me a new creation. I am thankful that He promises to continue to re-new me again and again. That in Christ we just keep getting re-newed each day. We don't have to live in the same patterns, as surely as the sun rises each day, his mercies are new.

Are you a New Year's Resolution kinda gal? 

Has God given you a word for 2016?

I'd love to hear it!

SEVEN

This pretty girl is SEVEN! Her birthday falls 3 short days after her brothers'.

To see her six year old pics/interview, click here.

I can hardly get over how much she has grown this year. In the last 18 months she has shot up 8 inches! 

Esther is a joy!

She is truly one of the bravest people I have ever met.

She can laugh at herself which is a hard thing to learn when you're a kid!

She is kind and is good at sharing.

She is smart and catches on to things quickly.

She likes to play games with her friends and LOVES to win.

She definitely has strong leadership skills and likes to be in charge.

She is a very forgiving, loyal girl and we are so proud to be her parents!

At 7:

Favorite Color: pink

Favorite movie:Tangled

Favorite Food: Grilled Cheese

Favorite drink: Sprite

Favorite thing to play: jumprope

Favorite Friend: Asher and Eneles

Favorite thing to do with mom: "spend time together and watch movies"

Favorite thing to do with dad: "make paper airplanes"

Favorite Bible Story: "Noah's Ark"

Favorite subject in school: journal

What you want to be when you grown up: "a hockey player" (this was breaking news to all of us:)

{all pics were taken by Kristin Copher}

FIVE

It is hard to believe that this little lady is five!

We saw her sweet face for the first time (via photo) at 2, brought her home at 3, and somehow here she is, 

5 full years old!

To see her birthday pics/interview from last year, click here.

She is a girl that feels BIG. 

She is happy BIG and shows disappointment BIG!

 She is pure JOY. 

Her joy bubbles over in every area of her life. 

 She embraces life fully and finds wonder in the smallest details.

She loves her sister and her siblings and is the most affectionate child on the planet.

She is a prayer warrior.

She teaches me so much about dropping everything to pray whenever the Spirit leads.

 Favorites at Five

Favorite Colors: blue

Favorite Movie: Tinkerbell

Favorite Food: Rice

Favorite Drink: Fanta 

Favorite thing to play: "with my dolls"

Favorite Friend: Mphatso and Busisiwe

Favorite thing to do with mommy: "color with her and play with her"

Favorite thing to do with daddy: "play airplane with him"

What do you want to be when you grown up? "to be a good mom"

{So thankful to my friend Kristin Copher who spent so much time capturing these pictures of Asher during her time here in Africa!}

Arkansas to Africa {part 10 We are Theirs}

I have had several people ask me, "how in the world did y'all wind up in Africa"?

Most of the time that ends with me stuttering around and giving some kind of a lame answer.

Not because there isn't a really good (non-lame) answer,
but because it is hard to know where to get started.

Sooo, I thought I would begin to share the story that God wrote for us.
It is a looonng story that spans many years.
But don't worry, no chapter book today!
 I will give it to you a bit at a time!

If you want to catch up to speed, you can find:
Part 1 {here}
Part 2 {here}
Part 3 {here}
Part 4 {here}
Part 5 {here}
Part 6 {here}
Part 7 {here}
Part 8 {here}

Part 9 {here}

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Can't believe I am on part 10 today of our story today! Am I long winded or what? 

I think I will be wrapping this up here soon...but then again, I am not sure! 

Each week I sit down to write and see where the God leads.

A few weeks after last weeks dinner, we found ourselves in a living room surrounded by other families and single adults who had a passion for Esther's House and were praying about moving to Malawi. It really struck me that God had been preparing so many other hearts, not just ours. 

We ate and got to know one another. We shared our stories and shed some tears {public speaking is always awkward for me, especially if it involves something personal}.

I remember clearly that we met on a Friday night and our file and our girls' file was going to court 3 days later on Monday in Africa. That night, our timeline was asked about several times, and we still didn't have a clear answer.

This was October, and we were given some time to all really do some soul searching and make sure we could look our board in the eyes with 100% confidence and say that we felt God was telling us to move to Malawi.

In November, right before Thanksgiving, we found out that we passed court for our girls!!! The girls were officially ours and we were theirs. Just typing those words out brings back so many emotions! We also told our board we were 100% in to serving at Esther's House. We didn't know how it would all work out, but we all trusted that God would work out the details.

We began the paper work to turn into Homeland Security and the US Embassy for our girls AND we also tackled our lengthy application to work with Pure Mission. You could say that we were drowning in paperwork, but all those years in the adoption process had trained me to fill out paper work like a boss, so we tackled it with excitement and anticipation!

At that time, we estimated that we would be able to travel to bring our girls home in February and then hopefully move in May. We sent out this Christmas card to all of our friends and family letting them know our BIG news. Christmas was filled with gifts of pink jammies,  purple snow suits and baby dolls for little sisters.

But, what we should have learned by this point was that adoption timelines are as fluid as jello, we would soon learn some news that would change up all our plans......

Stay tuned for Part 11 next Friday!

Today I am linking up with Casey Wiegand and Oak + Oats.

We Love our Hair

Did you grow up on Sesame Street?
I did!
I love how they have always shown kids of every color on their show!
You never realize how important that is until you have a daughter or son from another ethnicity as you.

 I watched this video before the girls came home and loved it!
I showed it to them today and they have watched it over and over.
They've been running around the house all morning exclaiming, "I love my hair!"

At 4 and 6, they are already getting strong messages about how their hair is "nappy" or they need to put chemicals in their hair (that is the one they hear the most).

I love how this video celebrates the uniqueness of their hair and how it is awesome, just the way it is!




We started looking through old pictures and finding all the fun ways they have styled their locks.

 

{fro}

 

 

{braids with "mesh"}

 

 

{2 strand twists}

 

{puffs}

{different style braids with "mesh}



 

{corn rows}

 



 

 

 

{2 strand twists with yarn, which is perhaps my favorit yet!}

 

{their super cute 'do (yet, incredibly hard to take out) when we met them over a year ago}

 

 

{their current hairstyle (needing to come out) corn rows/pigtails}

 

Styling their hair has definitely been a learning experience for me. I  have a lot more to figure out!

We are so blessed to have so many women surrounding us that can do their hair.

I have a board on Pinterest here, that I collect pictures of different hair styles for future use.

 

My prayer is that our girls would always see how beautifully, and wonderfully made they are.

That they would see their hair as a unique gift!